Rabbi Amy Bernstein

RABBI AMY BERNSTEIN
Temple Israel
Minneapolis, Minnesota 

There are days I still can’t believe my good fortune.  I wake every morning beside my partner to the sound of our three year old daughter attempting to climb into our bed and (on good days) after a prayer of thanksgiving for my life, prepare to begin my day as rabbi of Temple Israel.  There was no way I could have imagined when I came out at the age of 16 that this life was possible.  I was then attending Yeshiva High School (an Orthodox Jewish high school) and the message was clear that a gay or lesbian relationship was completely outside the realm of holiness.  It was also clear that anyone living in a gay or lesbian relationship stood outside of the Tradition and any “family” created out of such a bond could only be a mockery of a Jewish family.  As a result of the conflict between my core identities I left Yeshiva High School, Judaism and Jewish life behind me for the rest of high school and college.  The void at my center was something I worked hard to ignore most of the time.  The few times when I felt compelled to engage with Judaism like the High Holidays or Passover, I would touch such pain that I resolved to keep my distance from it for another year.  It was in attending a Reconstructionist service at a gay and lesbian synagogue led by a lesbian rabbi that I began the long journey back to Jewish life and Jewish community and finally, to the rabbinate.  The hole in my center has been filled to such an extent that it stretches me ever further open from the inside.

I am so grateful for the generations of courageous leaders on whose shoulder I stand.  The people of all faiths and persuasions who have been willing to take serious risks with their lives and who, in so doing changed people’s hearts and minds through their integrity, created the possibility of my life as a lesbian rabbi.  Their courage and strength of character inspire and sustain me.  The people of Duluth and Superior who were willing to hire an out lesbian rabbi for a very public role as the face and voice of non-Orthodox Judaism in the Arrowhead region displayed a depth of integrity and openness to change that continues to humble me.  I am truly privileged to serve as their rabbi and teacher, honored to be asked to their hospital rooms and homes, and have been transformed by being entrusted with their stories and their struggles.  It is all of those who have gone before me who have earned the honor of this tallit.  It is the good people, Jewish and non-Jewish alike, of the Twin Ports who deserve to have it on display in honor of their leader.  I am grateful beyond measure to all of them and to those of you living and celebrating the uniqueness of your own challenging and holy lives.

This tallit (prayer shawl) was given in conjunction with One Voice Mixed Chorus' "Reclaiming Faith" concerts in January, 2007.

David Lohman
IWR and Faith Work Coordinator
National Gay & Lesbian Task Force's Institute for Welcoming Resources
Home of the Shower of Stoles Project
2007