Robert J. Moore

Robert J. Moore

I grew up in the Presbyterian Church, graduated at the top of my class, and served parishes for 13 years.  But I also had a shameful secret.  I struggled with my sexuality for 48 years before actually being able to accept myself for who I am.  Looking back, I can see that this needless struggle came about only because of misinformation I received from my faith tradition.  Even when I knew it wasn't true, it took years to undo the damage.  In 1990, I retired from Church work, so I could continue my struggle in a more supportive environment, and because I had by that time been diagnosed with HIV, and the Church did not feel like a safe place to be, no matter what the outcome of my personal struggle.  Today, I continue my ministry with children and their families by working as a school social worker.  I give my time to the Church whenever I can, and wherever it is welcome.  When I think about the Church's erroneous teaching, and its impact on lives like mine, all I can say is "What a waste!"

Robert's story is such a poignant example of the church's infliction of pain and violence on LGBT persons.  Robert, like so many others, spent a lifetime undoing the damage done through the church's abuse.  As if to rub salt in the wound, following his AIDS diagnosis he determined that the church, the first place he should be able to turn for support, was actually the least safe place he could imagine.  Robert left the pastorate and now ministers outside the bounds of the church as a school social worker.

The last line of Robert's story speaks volumes: "When I think about the Church's erroneous teaching, and its impact on lives like mine, all I can say is 'What a waste!'"

Martha Juillerat
Founder, Shower of Stoles Project
2006