Mark Haberman

Mark Haberman's first home was a seminary apartment at Drew Theological Seminary where his father was studying for ministry in the United Methodist Church.  While yet a child, Mark sensed God's call to ministry through the corporate worship of God.  Throughout twenty-four years, he served in music  and program ministry in three United Methodist churches in Minnesota, Iowa, and Idaho, first as a layperson, later as a diaconal minister and finally as a deacon in full connection.  Following the dissolution of his marriage, Mark chose to be "selectively out" for over five years before leaving the church in 2000.  He now serves as a non-profit program manager.

Mark Haberman originally gave us this stole anonymously.  After "coming out" and leaving the United Methodist church, Mark wrote us in 2002 and asked that his story be amended to include his name.  Mark is one of at least a dozen people represented in this collection who had hoped to follow a parent in the ministry but could not fulfill that calling because of their sexual orientation.

This stole in advance of the 2000 General Conference of the United Methodist Church in Cleveland, OH.  In 1999, the Reconciling Ministries Network (RMN) inquired about the possibility of having a display of the Shower of Stoles at the General Conference the following April.  At the time, there were only around twenty United Methodist stoles in the collection.  We decided to introduce the Shower of Stoles to the Reconciling community by bringing the twenty UM stoles and about a hundred others to RMN’s Convocation in Denton, TX over the Labor Day weekend.  Stoles started to trickle in during the fall, and by February they began coming in droves.  In all, we received 220 United Methodist stoles – the vast majority of them arriving within eight weeks of the Conference.  Thanks to a monumental effort by a number of volunteers who pitched in to help record, inventory, sew labels and make last-minute repairs, all of the new stoles were present in Cleveland.  Twenty more people brought stoles directly to Cleveland, bringing the total number on display to 240.

Towards the end of the General Conference, twenty eight lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender United Methodists and allies stood on the Conference floor in silent protest over the Conference’s failure to overturn the ban on LGBT ordination – a profound witness and act of defiance for which they were later arrested.  As these twenty eight moved to the front of the room, another 200 supporters stood up around the balcony railing, each wearing one of the new United Methodist stoles.  Hundreds more stood in solidarity as well, in the balcony and on the plenary floor, wearing symbolic “stoles” made from colorful bands of cloth.  A group of young people from Minneapolis, members of a Communicant’s Class, had purchased bolts of cloth the preceding evening and stayed up all night cutting out close to a thousand of these “stoles."  In less than eight months, a handful of stoles had grown to become a powerful, visible witness to the steadfast faith of LGBT United Methodists nationwide.

Martha Juillerat
Founder, Shower of Stoles Project
2006