Doug Nelson

Doug Nelson

This stole is submitted for Doug Nelson, a member of Dumbarton UMC in Washington, D.C., who opted not to pursue ministry in 1985 when he came to terms with his gay sexual orientation.  Doug currently works as a licensed professional counselor in Fairfax, VA.  He served as the Nurture Cluster Chairperson at Dumbarton from 1997-1999 and he currently teaches Sunday school for the high school juniors and seniors.  Doug may have been quite a pastor.

As a student at Bucknell University, Doug actively participated in the Fellowship of Christian Athletes and became president of his chapter his junior year.  By his senior year, Doug was acknowledging his sexuality and knew the church's stance against gay persons serving as ministers.  Doug opted to pursue his master's degree in counseling rather than attend seminary to pursue ministry.

Doug shared Bucknell's University Prize for Men, an award that distinguishes the outstanding graduating senior for his potential to serve the community.  The other recipient of the award currently serves as senior pastor of a Presbyterian congregation in West Hartford, CT.  Might Doug be serving as a pastor of a Methodist church had the church's policies on gays in the ministry been different?

As a counselor, Doug has helped many adolescents and adults with mental health and substance abuse problems.  Some clients have discussed issues of faith and spirituality with him in session.  In some respects, not wearing a ministerial collar has given Doug the opportunity to help persons who feel quite distant from their church upbringing to reexamine their faith.  Doug brings his Spirit-filled gifts to his counseling practice.  Yet many of his high school and college friends still wonder why a church would reject Doug's gifts simply because he is an openly gay man.

This is one of thirteen stoles given to us by Dumbarton UMC in advance of the 2000 General Conference of the United Methodist Church in Cleveland, OH.  Dumbarton is a Reconciling congregation, working for the full inclusion of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people into the life and leadership of the United Methodist Church.  In 1999, the Reconciling Ministries Network (RMN) inquired about the possibility of having a display of the Shower of Stoles at the General Conference the following April.  At the time, there were only around twenty United Methodist stoles in the collection.  We decided to introduce the Shower of Stoles to the Reconciling community by bringing the twenty UM stoles and about a hundred others to RMN’s Convocation in Denton, TX over the Labor Day weekend.  Stoles started to trickle in during the fall, and by February they began coming in droves.  In all, we received 220 United Methodist stoles – the vast majority of them arriving within eight weeks of the Conference.  Thanks to a monumental effort by a number of volunteers who pitched in to help record, inventory, sew labels and make last-minute repairs, all of the new stoles were present in Cleveland.  Twenty more people brought stoles directly to Cleveland, bringing the total number on display to 240.

 Towards the end of the General Conference, twenty eight lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender United Methodists and allies stood on the Conference floor in silent protest over the Conference’s failure to overturn the ban on LGBT ordination – a profound witness and act of defiance for which they were later arrested.  As these twenty eight moved to the front of the room, another 200 supporters stood up around the balcony railing, each wearing one of the new United Methodist stoles.  Hundreds more stood in solidarity as well, in the balcony and on the plenary floor, wearing symbolic “stoles” made from colorful bands of cloth.  A group of young people from Minneapolis, members of a Communicant’s Class, had purchased bolts of cloth the preceding evening and stayed up all night cutting out close to a thousand of these “stoles.”  In less than eight months, a handful of stoles had grown to become a powerful, visible witness to the steadfast faith of LGBT United Methodists nationwide.

Martha Juillerat

Founder, Shower of Stoles Project

2006