My Lesbian Daughter and Gay Son (Donated by Paul Beeman and the Pacific Northwest Chapter, MFSA)

HONORING MY LESBIAN DAUGHTER AND GAY SON

REV. PAUL BEEMAN
PACIFIC NORTHWEST ANNUAL CONFERENCE OF THE UNITED METHODIST CHURCH
NATIONAL PFLAG PRESIDENT

Since I am a United Methodist minister, my four children including a lesbian daughter and gay son grew up in the church.  While Betty and I have totally supported them and loved them unconditionally, the church has abandoned them, condemned their lives, and left them spiritually homeless.  They are among the Exodus of perhaps 600,000 gay and lesbian United Methodists who have silently slipped away.  My son considered becoming a minister and later considered suicide, after he discovered his commitment to Christ was unacceptable for the church's service.

After 42 years as a minister, I can no longer wear this stole as a symbol of my profession in the church I have served, never again until people like my son and daughter are recognized by the church as children of God and welcomed for their spiritual worth.

Today I serve as national president of PFLAG -- Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays -- an organization of 440 local chapters and nearly a hundred-thousand people united in the commitments of unconditional love.

In a demonstration at the United Methodist General Conference in May, 2000, this stole was worn by Amory Peck, whom I had united with her life partner, Linda Lambert, in a Holy Union -- for them an act of Christian commitment, for me an act of pastoral ministry, yet in defiance of the General Conference and Judicial Council's ban of such ceremonies.  I will be happy to be charged and tried for faithfulness to my calling.  I will be thrilled when my church welcomes all its children.

Paul Beeman's anger and grief are palpable in this brief narrative.  A man of immense faith and grace, he has chosen to channel all this pain into a commitment to rid the church and society of their homophobia and discriminatory practices.  As National PLFAG President, and as an active volunteer with the Reconciling Ministries Network and Parents' Reconciling Network.

This is one of four stoles (#675-677) given to us by the Pacific Northwest Chapter of the Methodist Federation for Social Action (MFSA).  MFSA was founded in 1907 by several Methodist Episcopal clergy (including Frank Mason North, author of "Where Cross the Crowded Ways of Life") to direct church attention to the enormous human suffering among the working class. Immediately the Federation became Methodism's unofficial rallying point for the Social Gospel and achieved in 1908 the adoption of the first denominational social creed.  Today, the Federation unites activist United Methodists to promote action on the liberation issues confronting the church and society and to witness to the transformation of the social order that is intrinsic to the church's entire life, including its evangelism, preaching, counseling, and spirituality.  As an independent organization, MFSA works primarily through the ministries of the United Methodist Church, supporting and augmenting peace and justice ministries at the local, conference, and national levels, calling the church to expand its understanding of the radical call of the Gospel to be the inclusive, justice-seeking, risk-taking Body of Christ.

These stoles were given to us in advance of the 2000 General Conference of the UnitedMethodistChurch in Cleveland, OH.  In 1999, the Reconciling Ministries Network (RMN) inquired about the possibility of having a display of the Shower of Stoles at the General Conference the following April.  At the time, there were only around twenty United Methodist stoles in the collection.  We decided to introduce the Shower of Stoles to the Reconciling community by bringing the twenty UM stoles and about a hundred others to RMN’s Convocation in Denton, TX over the Labor Day weekend.  Stoles started to trickle in during the fall, and by February they began coming in droves.  In all, we received 220 United Methodist stoles – the vast majority of them arriving within eight weeks of the Conference.  Thanks to a monumental effort by a number of volunteers who pitched in to help record, inventory, sew labels and make last-minute repairs, all of the new stoles were present in Cleveland.  Twenty more people brought stoles directly to Cleveland, bringing the total number on display to 240.

Towards the end of the General Conference, twenty eight lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender United Methodists and allies stood on the Conference floor in silent protest over the Conference’s failure to overturn the ban on LGBT ordination – a profound witness and act of defiance for which they were later arrested.  As these twenty eight moved to the front of the room, another 200 supporters stood up around the balcony railing, each wearing one of the new United Methodist stoles.  Hundreds more stood in solidarity as well, in the balcony and on the plenary floor, wearing symbolic “stoles” made from colorful bands of cloth.  A group of young people from Minneapolis, members of a Communicant’s Class, had purchased bolts of cloth the preceding evening and stayed up all night cutting out close to a thousand of these “stoles.”  In less than eight months, a handful of stoles had grown to become a powerful, visible witness to the steadfast faith of LGBT United Methodists nationwide.

Martha Juillerat

Founder, Shower of Stoles Project

2006